# 5 January 2006, 01:26
INT. MEETING ROOM – DAY
All is grey. Even the fluorescent lights give off a dirty light. Filling cabinets line the walls, breaking only at the single doorway where the carpet is threadbare.
OFFICIAL 1
You know, we really need to do something cool and different to address some of the tough economic issues we can see coming up in the next few decades.
CONSULTANT
I like this place and the people (and the food!), I think it has great potential. I’ve got some ideas that other people think are cool – do you want to hear them?
OFFICIAL 2
Oh yes please! We know we need to do something but haven’t a clue how.
CONSULTANT
Creative this, international that, economic the other etc … Basically I think you should paint the town RED.
OFFICIAL 3
Wow! What great ideas! We love this! RED huh? This is EXACTLY what we’ve been waiting to hear. We think you’re absolutely right! Great! Give us a minute and we’ll try to come up with some money and so on to make it all happen.
CONSULTANT
Ok that’s nice. Look, err… I’ve type of been down this road before you know. It was very painful and frustrating. I want to make myself clear. RED – right? Any other colour won’t work. It’s got to be RED – bright RED – everywhere. Every little detail of it – RED OK?
OFFICIAL 1
Got it! Great! We agree! RED! Great! – we’ll let you know.
CONSULTANT
Yes, RED. And we have to do it properly and start NOW if you want to get it noticed by the time people are looking for RED towns, which they will be doing real soon – there are lots of other towns out there thinking about what colour they should be.
OFFICIAL 2
Yes, we know! We gotta act now!
CONSULTANT
And if you want ME to do it with you, THIS is the way I want to work; structures, goals, decision making, planning, communications, STRATEGY etc.
OFFICIAL 3
Hmm, right, strategy err.. Well, we don’t actually have anyone that does strategy round here. It’s not the way we work really, it’s type of a group consensus thing you know, we’re not like that – get there by default rather than by design.
CONSULTANT
Yeah, I know, that’s why I’m pointing it out right at the start – I’m not going to get burned again. Let me say it clear – like REALLY clear – if you want me to do it, THIS IS THE WAY I WORK! – got it?
OFFICIAL 1
Oh! Yes, we got it! Great! We really need someone who can get things done with your knowledge and experience and contacts and everything. You might have to spend some time talking to people and convincing them about your ideas though.
CONSULTANT
No problem – I expected that – in fact I even welcome that – I want more ideas and more people involved – a team of inspired, intuitive thinkers in fact.
OFFICIAL 2
Wow! That’s cool – we must do that. Let’s get back to you as soon as we can now.
CONSULTANT
Ok – remember.. RED OK?
OFFICIAL 3
Right! RED! Good idea! We’ll make you the Project Director. Just got to check a couple of things – back in a minute!
INT. MEETING ROOM – DAY
Time passes. No one has any clue what is going on. The people who were lined up with paint brushes ready to get their hands dirty wandered off weeks ago. Months go by. Then, when it’s already way too late…
OFFICIAL 1
Ok – sorry to keep you waiting – here’s some BLUE paint. It’s not as much as we need, and there’s lots of bits you can’t paint at all. But it’s a start, right?
CONSULTANT
You know, I kinda said it had to be RED?
OFFICIAL 1
Yeah, but BLUE is better than GREY right? And we’re moving a long way in your direction.
CONSULTANT
I don’t want to paint the town BLUE. It won’t get noticed by people looking for RED towns.
OFFICIAL 1
Aw, come on… It’s nearly RED. And we love your ideas Mr Project Director!
CONSULTANT
I don’t want to be the project director of a plan to paint the town RED when we can only paint half of it BLUE. You don’t really understand what I’m talking about do you?
OFFICIAL 1
Look, Rome wasn’t painted RED in a day you know. You gotta show people a new colour could work.
CONSULTANT
Fine, you do it. Call me when it’s all fucked up and it doesn’t work and you want me to give you some more advice for you to ignore.
OFFICIAL 1
You’re being unreasonable. We have restrictions. We’d like to paint it all RED, we agree with you. Come on, help us slap a bit of BLUE around – we’ve got the money for that (only do it real quick right, we’ve run out of time because we’ve been talking about it for way too long).
CONSULTANT
Nope – not interested.
OFFICIAL 1
Let’s talk about this some more.
CONSULTANT
You’re not listening to me are you?